The Greatest Love Academy

Saying I struggled with self-love and acceptance would be a strong understatement.

I grew up in the Bible Belt of the Midwest in a very religious family, where my uncle was actually my pastor for many years. I attended church conferences, I was there to open and close our church, I spoke in tongues, I danced in the Spirit, I sang for the Lord. But I had one blemish that no amount of church could seem to erase: I was a closeted gay man.

I grew up getting taunted by my sister’s boyfriend for simply existing; I didn’t know what gay was at 6 years old (Include video link on YT). Just when I found the courage to leave the church and try things on my own, I cautiously came out of the closet, and I began dating a man who I was convinced I was going to spend the rest of my life with.

Everything was good until one day, after nearly 10 years, he decided that we should separate. My entire world was shattered, and our separation threw me into the pits of emotional despair. I had suicidal ideations and was convinced something was wrong with me.

I had been in therapy. I had been doing my own personal healing and development work. But I had a lot of baggage and trauma that prevented me from living as a truly realized person who was comfortable in his own body.

Bit by bit, I unpacked and sat in the emotion of the breakup. Then I went deeper into my past and began addressing and dealing with the trauma of my past. And of my self-rejection and self-hate as a gay man.

Throughout this process, the voice of my favorite entertainer and singer, Whitney Houston, would not leave me. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t hear or run across her performing, “The Greatest Love of All.”

I’d heard the song a thousand times before, but with all of my trauma brought to the surface, I heard it with new ears.

That song became my instruction manual for developing a toolkit of practices to recover, rebuild my life, and finally learn to love myself.

It is now my great privilege to share this with others. No one should suffer from hopelessness and despondency. Believe it or not, there is always a step-by-step way back to self-love, and I have been entrusted with sharing that way with you.

I promise you, it is worth it.

Sure, it may be easy for me to say that having done the work, but I can assure you of this: if you show up, do the work, and simply persevere and stay consistent, you will get there too. Even if you are in a sunken place of pain, heartbreak, and despair.